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Just the sixteen of us

November 25, 2011

I worked with a Baptist pastor’s wife, a few years back. We were both secondary school teachers and good friends. One Monday morning, slouched in the staffroom and bracing ourselves for another week at the chalkface, she sighed and said, “What a weekend. People have been knocking on our front door all weekend.”

I thought a moment, then said, “They’ve been knocking on our bedroom door all weekend.”

I exaggerated. On the whole, “they” let my wife and I sleep between the hours of twelve and eight. I was making an ironic reference to our communal lifestyle. You see, my wife and I and our three small kids live in an intentional Christian community with eleven other people (“intentional” is the buzz phrase for such communities; I think it means we don’t live there by accident.)

White Stone House and those who live in it

It’s a thirteen bedroom house. We live with two other married couples, neither with any kids – yet; seven single people (four of whom are celibate, committed to lifelong singleness); a highly independent cat; and a tank full of tropical fish. (The fish find community okay, except when they bite and fight each other. The humans are much the same.)

We share most of our stuff and all of our money via a common bank account. And lots of other people – church members, friends, neighbours, lads off the street – come round lots.

Our house in Coventry, White Stone House, is part of a Christian community movement called the New Creation Christian Community, which in turn is part of a UK-wide church called the Jesus Army.

Earlier this year I had the delight of meeting and interviewing Mark Powley of the “Breathe” network. You can read the thought-provoking stuff he said to me that day here. In the course of our chat that day, he said he’d love some “Breathe” posts to be written by someone who lives in an intentional community. Perhaps from that day I was a marked man (if you’ve met Mark, you may know what I mean). Anyway, now my voice has been added to the “Breathe” chorus. I’m honoured; I hope that some of my everyday accounts of a somewhat un-everyday lifestyle will mean something to “Breathe” readers.

I’ll share stories from community, thoughts from community, the chaos of community, and the beauty of community. Some posts may originate from my personal blog, man-with-the-mop.blogspot.com, some, like this one, will be written specially for “Breathe”.

Earlier I mentioned “lots of people coming round lots”. This coming weekend that is especially true: we have a “community weekend” during which we’re deliberately inviting several friends to stay with us.

The reason we’re doing this is because, for us, community has to be outward-looking. It has to be about a wider community, a big circle of people, all being drawn towards a common centre – the God who is love. If that sounds mystical, that’s because it is. But it’s the kind of mystical reality that comes via group games, via homemade curry and chapattis, via walks in the woods, via lots of washing up (there’s an endless supply of washing up in community), via laughter, and sometimes via tears.

I’ll let you know how it goes. Hopefully it’ll be great fun.

And if they knock on our bedroom door, we’ll cope. For this weekend anyway.

The Clothing Season: The shoes that God gave me

October 25, 2011
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It’s safe to say that I’m not really a shoe person. I went barefoot for enough of my African childhood to feel more at home with a breeze between my toes. Living where I do now, barefoot is not really an option, but I’m fussy about my footwear. Once I find a pair of comfortable shoes, I’m loathe to give them up. But they keep changing the fashions, and generally speaking you can’t just walk into a shop and say ‘same again please’.

Consequently, and to the consternation of my wife, I tend to wear my shoes into the ground. Literally, this time around – you could see daylight through the heel of my trainers. When I found myself walking on tiptoes on rainy days, I knew it was time for them to go.

I could have just gone to the shoe shop and bought something, but I’ve read too many reports on sweatshop labour. I know what goes on in the factories where trainers are made, the low wages and the long hours. There is no fair-trade mark for shoes, but I wanted an ethical pair of trainers.

To complicate matters further, I had just read a report on waste that mentioned that the sole of a discarded trainer will take a thousand years to decompose. That’s our best guess. They weren’t wearing sneakers during the Norman Conquest, so we don’t have a thousand year old trainer to test the theory. Either way, I have a large enough pile of shoes to outlive me already, festering on in landfill long after I’ve shuffled off this mortal coil. So I looked into shoes that were both biodegradeable and ethically made.

Read more…

The Clothing Season: One in, one out

October 25, 2011

I have to admit that buying lots of clothes is not something I struggle with, or (as my wife will testify) give much thought to. As I began to realise how deeply consumerism pervades my life I began to think about food, energy, transport, housing, giving and sooner or later I came to the issue of clothes.

When I looked at my wardrobe it occurred to me that perhaps, after all, we did indeed have quite a lot of them. So I asked myself this question, and perhaps it’s one you might like to consider too.

‘How many days in a row can I wear a different set of clothing before I run out?’ This doesn’t mean turning up to work in your swimming gear, I hasten to add, but simply do I have enough clothes for a week? A month? A year?

Have a think, work it out and then ask yourself, ‘how comfortable am I with this answer? For me, witnessing the sharp end of poverty made the answer all the more uncomfortable. I have a crystal clear memory of a small boy in Burundi whose only item of clothing was a ragged, filthy T-shirt several sizes too big that I wouldn’t use to to mop up oil from my car with. That kind of encounter does tend to throw things into sharp relief.

So what to do? The first step was considering what I already had. The second step for me, was to stem the tide. I cleared out and I gave away. If I couldn’t remember when I last wore it, or my wife didn’t want to remember when I last wore it, out it went. This continued until we got to a level that we considered, well, enough. Not too little for our day to day lives, not without choice but not overwhelmed by it  either.

Thirdly, I battled with the mindset that old equals bad. You know, as in old-fashioned. The tyranny of the new can be oppressive. Simple as.

The fourth stage was then to develop a simple strategy that would keep me more or less in the right place from that point onwards. This powerful strategy has worked wonders for me, ever since. One in, one out. So, if I wear something out then I replace it. If, as happens every now and then, something new comes my way then we take a look at what hasn’t been worn in a while and can be given away. It’s simple, flexible and effective. It doesn’t stop you buying something new that you like the look of but it does stop that wardrobe from getting out of control.

Although it is only sporadically adopted by the other members of my family who upon questioning about their lack of zeal for this, simply ask me when I’m going to apply the same idea to my library? Well, like I said buying too many clothes is not my struggle.

Lastly, when we buy, we look to buy what we need and the best we can reasonably manage in our budget. This lesson was powerfully driven home to me when I went inter-railing as a student. My friend bought cheap sandals, a cheap t-shirt at the market and some cheap sunglasses. I bought some decent sandals and was happy with the rest I had. His feet blistered, when it got hot the colours in his t-shirt ran making him look like a banana and he broke three pairs of sunglasses. 14 years later my sandals are only just about worn out.

I’ll buy new and I’ll buy the best I can manage (within our budget) so that they hopefully last us as long as possible and hopefully represent a reasonable deal for the person who stitched it all together.

Those are my clothing rules, what are yours?

The Clothing Season: Charity Shopping

October 21, 2011
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Thanks to Sally for these thoughts. I have to say that of all the contributions so far, these struck me as having a particular care and authenticity. I am challenged!

This is actually something I’ve been thinking about a lot recently. Due to the fact that I’m always broke and can never find clothes I like (or which are ethical) on the high street I recently made an active decision to only buy second hand clothes. I work in a charity shop, which means this is probably easier and less time consuming for me than for others and I feel considerably happier that my money is going to a charity which aims to help local deprived communities rather than to some big corporation which is exploiting hundreds of people. I have managed to find some lovely articles of clothing which are quirky and unique and much more suited to me than anything I could currently buy new! (I also know that no one else will be wearing the same thing as me!) Having said that, I also believe it is essential for us to campaign for change within the clothing industry and not just avoid it – the people who make our clothes deserve a fair wage.

The passage in Matthew about not worrying about what we wear has been particularly relevant to me in recent months as on a few occasions I have been in a situation where my last remaining skirt has fallen apart or I have no shoes that aren’t full of holes and I’ve really just had to trust that God would look after me and provide both the money and the clothes I need! I may have had to go around with wet feet for a couple of weeks on some occasions, and I spent most of last winter without a coat, but in general God has looked after me and I know that He will continue to do so! (And being slightly wet and cold is nothing compared to the way some people live – at least I work and live in warm, dry buildings so the lack of coat was nowhere near as bad as it could have been!)

About a year ago in our church someone spoke on Romans 12:2 – ‘Do not be conformed to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.’ It was a very challenging message which pointed out a number of areas where we all tend to conform without realising it. I think one of the ways we do this is in relation to clothes – I find it very easy to envy what other people are wearing and to forget that the body is more than clothes (Luke 12:22).

However, I also believe that the way we dress can be a form of art and self expression, I just think we need to be careful what values we are expressing (wearing clothes which advertise brands who we know do not deal ethically with their workers, or not following the command to dress modestly for example). It is important to celebrate our diversity in fashion, not condemn each other. I heard recently that non uniform days at school tend to be the worst attended in the school year – we are taught to judge each other on how we look from a very young age which is incredibly sad…

OK, so I’m really challenegd to try the charity option more than I currently do.  I think there’s definitely an important point about diversity, too. Is my clothing the symbol of a transformed mind, or an indicator that I’m conforming to the pattern of this world?

Enough gathering

October 10, 2011
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This weekend was the Enough gathering, and a bunch of us got together at the appropriately eco-styled National Forest YHA. We had discussions, talks, prayers, a dawn bird walk, good food and plenty of great conversation. The kids even got to make rockets.

Thanks to Elly and Betsy, Ruth and Mark, and all those involved in organising the weekend. Thanks too to the YHA staff for making us very welcome and putting up with our bizarre requests. I get the impression we weren’t typical guests…

And thanks to all who came along, for the stories and ideas, the inspiration and the good company!

 

Read more…

The Clothing Season: Ethical Fashion Scores

October 7, 2011

OK, this is where consumer power actually begins to mean something. I nearly went NUTS trying to buy a decent pair of trousers in Marks and Spencers (how many duff chords can one shop stock??!). But I wanted to give my custom to a shop that was at least trying to make some progress. Apparently it was worth it (they score 3.5/5). I’m surprised by the score Primark got (some stuff just feels disconcertingly cheap!). And I’m very disappopinted by Fat Face (1/5). I was getting fed up of touchy-feely, ‘live life’ brands already, now I’m growing cynical.

But that’s the point of these scores. They empower the consumer. And, do you know what, if Primark can score 3/5 and sell stuff so ridiculously cheap; then the other firms in the Labout Behind the Label survey can afford to pull their finger out and employ people to drive this process along. But they won’t do it until we demand it.

So read the scores in full. Make your choices. As we do, things will change…

http://www.labourbehindthelabel.org/campaigns/itemlist/category/250-company-profiles

The Clothing Season: What place for beauty?

October 4, 2011
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And now for an alternative view! Steve speaks up for clothes as an expression of beauty:

For some people, clothing is art. Though, looking around, I also observe that, for others, it aint!

Members of my family are professional artists who are involved in the design and selection and careful use of textiles and colour and design in the clothing industry. As was clearly and entertainingly described in the movie, “The Devil Wears Prada” there is a real talent and skill in clothes design, just in fashion clothes, apart from practical clothes. We should celebrate that endeavour and enjoy the improved quality of life it brings even to those who don’t “get it”.  Moreover, the film is well balanced because it also points out that over-dedication (mixed with wrong attitudes to people and life) can lead to a very empty life indeed.

So, what’s my point? That clothes are not just practical. Whether you like or not clothes are part of your message to the world, displaying what your values are!
You can show that you care about yourself, and the world as well by dressing elegantly and inexpensively. That clothes fall into the domain of art, so that by ignoring fashion, we ignore art and we ignore our right to celebrate the beauty of life and creation, and we end up trolling around churches with the “knockers” knocking the heads off statues to prevent people from getting carried away. Again, looking around, we’re not in danger.

So are clothes just cloth? Or are they expressive, symbolic and beautiful? Could it be that if we forget either of these things we miss the point? So that leaves me with some further questions:

  • How often do I get carried away over clothes (either positively or negatively)?
  • What do I want my clothes to express? Can I see them as a celebration?

The Clothing Season: 10 Rules of Clothes Shopping

September 27, 2011

OK, this next contribution is almost pure provocation. But I think that anyone with a £10 annual clothes budget has earned the right to hold forth on these things:

The Ten Rules of Clothes Shopping

1.      Don’t.

2.      Don’t.

3.      You have a wardrobe full of clothes. Wear them.

4.      Don’t.

5.      Look at the label in your clothes. It should have a number on it. If it says “age” before the number, then you can buy a whole new set of clothes every two years. If it doesn’t, then you can’t. If you still outgrow your clothes, then why not lose some weight? Then you won’t need new clothes.

6.      Don’t.

7.      “Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes.” – Henry Thoreau.

8.      If you really have to buy new clothes, try the charity shops first. It’s no good feeling virtuous just by sending things there; somebody has to buy them.

9.      Try borrowing, or clothes-swap parties.

10.  If you have to buy new:

Cotton should be organic (cotton is the crop which takes the largest amount of fertiliser and pesticides in the world) and Fair Trade (if you pay £4 for a pair of denims, how much do you think the person who sewed them got?)

Polyester is often recycled from plastic bottles (PET). If you use and recycle plastic bottles, buy them back!

And don’t forget, the only fabrics which should go into landfill are the rags you used to clean up when you dismantled the car engine. Most charity shops take rags for recycling.

I try to keep my clothes budget to under £10 a year. I have to buy new swimsuits. Last year my daughter got married, so a whole new outfit.

Sally

The Clothing Season: No More Rags

September 23, 2011
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I was moved to tears this morning reading the latest stuff from Tearfund. Here’s something to put the issue of clothes into perspective (and an illustration of the power of what we wear):

Tulo Raistrick visited a community in Uganda in March to see how the church had been making a difference. He writes ’Around 40 people from the community came along to welcome me. After a few miutes of the men talking, I turned to the women present, and asked if church mobilization had made any difference for them.

One after another, women stood up and told amazing stories. One said, “I was a drunkard, wearing rags. Now look at me.” She was wearing the most fantastic colourful dress. She continued, “Because of the church, I learned to take respnsibility for my life. I started saving and stopped drinking. I started up a sewing business. NOw I have income to send my children to school.”‘

The Clothing Season: Beyond Ethical

September 21, 2011

Time to kick off the guest contributors with a challenging piece from Dave, writing from Pakistan:

Ethical clothing? Fair wage for workers, health and safety, environmentally-friendly inputs, sounds all very nice.

We talk about the need for good jobs, safe jobs, ethical jobs, but what about just the need for jobs? We talk about the need for health and safety, adequate lighting, work life balance, a good working environment, but what most of the poor want is a job, any job! People in countries like Pakistan, Bangladesh, Laos, Vietnam are excited when a new sweatshop opens, because it means jobs, it means income, it means some money to send their kids to school, to buy medicine, to eat food.

Ethical clothing sounds like a great idea. But sadly much of it is a largely ineffective niche where a small handful of people get ripped off by manufacturers because they think the extra they pay goes on fair wages or health and safety, when most of it ends up as profit for the company – remember when Costa Coffee offered Fairtrade coffee for 10p more? 9p of that was Costa profit, only 1p went back to the farmer in Guatemala. And sadly sometimes the righteous desire for ethics in clothing manufacture is abated by the satisfaction of buying one ethical T-shirt rather than campaigning for widespread change. Rather we need to understand how we can build these ideas into the mainstream, but much much more so, how we can encourage pro-poor economic development such that people aren’t so desperate for a job, any job, that they would gladly work in a sweat shop.

Read more…

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